"What we do in this life, echoes in eternity."
Maximus, Gladiator
"Our creator would never have made such lovely days, and given us the deep hearts to enjoy them, above all thought, unless we were meant to be immortal."
Nathaniel Hawthorne

Monday, February 18, 2008

Viewing the future

On Valentine's Day after my very depressing post, we finally went out to dinner to Bajio's. It's not a romantic place at all, and so we figured it wouldn't be crowded. So we went, and we loved the food. I felt slightly guilty because for once my kids ate ALL of the food we got for them, even Swan Princess.
On the way back everyone was very tired (from eating so much and the late hour), and I was relishing the hours I could spend drinking mate and reading "Eclipse" for the third time. When we pulled into our driveway, I got out of the car to open the garage door (our garage door doesn't work/is lost), and I thought I'd be a good wife. While Gorgeous Boricua parked the car in the garage, I decided to take out the garbage cans. It was Thursday, and our garbage is picked up very early on Fridays. Next thing I remember is being aware of my head knocking on the driveway, and bounce there a couple of times. I had slipped on the ice and landed flat on my back. The garbage spilled all on top of me. It was a full can of garbage. I couldn't move, and I started to cry because everyone was going inside the house; no one realized I had fallen. When I called out for Jeff (I'll just use real names, whatever!), he said, "What are you doing there?" And he came over and helped, while my little Gorgeous Boy cried. So I tried to be happy so my babies wouldn't be afraid, but my whole body hurt. I just wanted to go to bed.
I got everyone ready for bed; the sugar they had eaten non stop all day was finally going down, and they were tired. And when I saw their little sleeping faces, I wondered what would've happen if I had been by myself, if I had hit my head harder on the floor, if something would've happened to me on Valentine's Day night. You know how they say that when you're about to die, or experience a great shock, you see your life flash in front of you. I didn't see my past; I saw my alternative futures. I shuddered, and thanked Heavenly Father for giving me this present, for letting me be healthy and whole for my children. For giving me a husband who can provide so that I can stay home with my babies and see them grow, and fight, and be happy.
Most of all, I was scared; scared about how fragile life is. How life can change and end with the blink of an eye. I really want to enjoy every moment I have with them. Even when they fighting, the house is a mess, and laundry is reproducing exponentially in the hampers.

Thursday, February 14, 2008

Sometimes things don't go as planned

First of all, Happy Valentine's Day! There hasn't been much romance in this household, but there's been a lot of love. El Cangri and I baked cookies this morning, and he "wowed" and "ahhhhed" every time I rolled the dough and pressed the cookie cutters. He also cut the cookies, and did a splendid job at it. The most beautiful image of him is his little serious face trying not to make eye contact with me while sneaking a piece of cookie dough into his mouth. Every time I caught him, he'd try to redeem himself by offering some cookie dough to his baby sister. The cookies didn't turn out that well, but we sure had fun making them!
In the afternoon I went to Gorgeous Boy's school party. I was in charge of the game, and we played "steal my heart" (the kids had to pick up conversation hearts with a straw) and "steal my smile" (they had to try not to smile when it wasn't their turn). My beautiful boy lost dismally at the last game; he just can't stop smiling.
My Princess made Valentines for all her friends, and at the moment is dancing at the sound of High School Musical with her best friend. She's also ecstatic because Dandi's foot is completely healed and doesn't need the cast anymore. Hooray!
And yes, things don't go as planned, but what do you do? You just keep going and trying to be happy for the children's sake. We might still go to the movies and watch "Spiderwick," we might still go out to eat (I'm emotionally exhausted to make dinner. I just folded a load of laundry from Monday. That's all the housework I can do at the moment.), but for now, we'll just stay home and wait for tomorrow. I know, how depressing! What makes me so sad is that we do have so many blessings, but just a few gray clouds manage to overcast every good thing in our lives. Material trials, trials with family members, depression, I can handle. As long as my children are healthy and happy, I'm happy. Send whatever you want our way, just let my children be safe and happy. That's all I care about.

Tuesday, February 12, 2008

I am Legend

I have a few minutes that I can use to finish laundry, start dinner, or update my blog; so here I am, updating my blog. What a tough choice! ;)
Today I wanted to talk about a movie that Jeff and I saw about three weeks ago, and that has been haunting me ever since. As you may have guessed, the movie is "I am Legend", an adaptation from the classic horror book by Richard Matheson , and played by the genious Will Smith (we're huge fans of the Prince of Bel-Air, which was how he became famous). Basically the story is about a miracle cancer-curing vaccine that went horribly wrong. 90% of humanity dies immediately as a result of the vaccine, and those who don't die, a)have natural immunity to the virus but are eaten by b) the vampire-zombies mutant people who hunt for blood. Eventually Neville (Smith) is the only survivor in New York City. His only company, a beautiful German Shepherd who belonged to his daughter. His wife and daughter had perished at the beginning of the pandemic; thus, they're spared the horror the world has become.
Neville is a super-man in every sense of the word: he customizes and arms his house to be ready to protect him at night (when the zombies come out), he keeps studying and looking for a cure to the disease (even capturing zombies to test a vaccine, something that will threaten the life he has protected so much), he works out, he hunts (what a sight! deer running wild in NYC, and being hunted by lions!)
I'll leave the summary at that, just warning people that the movie is not like a horror movie in the sense that they show gory stuff. It's just so freaking scary because of the suspense, and because the reality of a pandemic could be so real!!!!!!!
There' s two points from the movie that struck me as VERY controversial for our times. The first one is that a vaccine was the cathalist for the pandemic to be unleashed. And that's very controversial nowadays because people have such blind fate in the vaccines we inject our children with. I know, some vaccines save lives, but so many others (even some of those who are harmless for someone can be fatal for someone else) are sooooo dangerous (the new HPV vaccine comes to mind. Yes, the one marketed for pre-teen girls suppossedly to prevent cervical cancer. It's actually against the STD that creates a predisposition for cervical cancer). It just blows my mind how some people do all the research in the world when they need to buy a car or a house, but when it comes to the "medicines" they give their kids, they just trust the doctors blindly! I love medicine; I believe our lives are better because of all the advances in modern medicine (I would have died of post-partum infection last year if there weren't antibiotics), but I also believe that we need to diligent and protect our kids and ourselves from things that are totally preventable. Yes, vaccines could protect against life-threatening diseases, but what about the good ol' childhood illnesses that today are unheard of: chicken pox, measles, etc. Or if we get them, they're even more dangerous because we're fully vaccinated and nature has tried to outsmart man.
The other topic that stood out from the movie was the argument about God. In the movie, Neville says there could be no God at all in this world, but another character argues with him and shows him that even though mankind almost exterminated itself by playing "god", God has a plan for us, and he wants us to be happy.
All in all, this movie really touched my heart and terrified me in so many ways, but I'm happy I saw it. On a very funny note, my best friend G had her mother-in-law tell her and husband to take advantage and go see a movie; she would stay with their baby. So they decided to take their other two kids to see...yes, you guessed it. They had no idea what the movie was about! The poor kids were terrified, but she and her husband didn't want to miss the show, and they really wanted to see the end! So she said, maybe I've traumatized them for life. We'll see in a few years. Jajajajajaja!

Sunday, February 10, 2008

My Cangri is 3!!!!

Yes, Mr Cangri just turned three today, and he had such a great day. He got a Backyardingan's book, coloring book, and a Play-Dough Set. He also got a Mickey Mouse book. Presents were very modest this year for two reasons: 1) We have all been VERY sick all week, and I didn't venture out to shop until Saturday Evening. I went to Wal-Mart and of course, there was nothing there...Saturday nights at the store is like going to the store after a huge storm or catastrophe is announced; there's nothing on the shelves. The good part is that you can tell people get ready for the Sabbath...
Well, reason 2) He doesn't really need any more toys. I was going to order more wooden cars online, or an extra outfit for Pepe his doll, but I was just going to buy for the sake of it. so I decided not to. He was VERY excited with his presents, and he played all day with Swan Princess' Pets.
I made a cake for him and my sister-in-law with her two children came over, which was so nice of her. Both set of grandparents called him, and we saw his baby pictures. He was a doll when he blew the candles; all bashful because He was the center of the attention. It was a very peaceful day; a good day to recover.
Recover from the aweful flu! Gorgeous Boricua got sick on Friday, but the fever didn't start until Saturday. Sunday morning the two older children got fevers. Luckily (was it really just luck?) the two babies never got terribly sick. They just had a very mild fever, and then, of course, earaches. Swan Princess on the other haand had a fever of...gasp!, 105!!!! My poor little flaca didn't complain at all while I watch her get thinner and more fragile every second. Gorgeous Boy had very high fevers too, and he also got nightmares: the one in which doctors chase him with laser beams, Scooby Doo, Dementors...With the dementors he was actually running away from them, which was oh! so creepy to see! And of course, like the man he is, and just like his father, he complained like he was dying, while my little Princess was burning up in complete silence...
On Tuesday I took them to the clinic, but the doctor didn't have room to see all four of them, so they told me to take the two sicker ones. What a tough choice! At least it was only influenza.
I only had a runny nose and a sore throat, and mine was most likely due to the exhaustion. By the fifth night I couldn't get up at all, and then my Prince took over and got up to take care of everybody.
It's almost over, and tomorrow the kids will go to school...and I'll get ready for Valentine's Day and el Cangri's birthday party!!!!!